My Second Life · {the life of jane}

{safe haven or self imposed prison?}

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I have been thinking back to my early days in SL, on my first avatar… I got on her last night to get some old pictures and got sucked down a memory worm hole. I was a social butterfly on Kay. I ran around to all the clubs, I worked as a dancer, host, and DJ. I loved DJing… that was one of my favorite past times in my old SL life. I was party girl… who may or may not have been slightly mentally unhinged at the time. I had a really drama filled romance that (at least in old note cards) played out like a bad fan fiction. Kayleigh had a full… all be it crazy… second life.

It was so odd to think that was me. That I am really the same person, well I guess I am really not that person any more. Now clubs give me panic attacks, I always feel like I am not wanted or welcome there. It’s a problem in my RL that I never in a million years thought would pass over in SL.

This weekend I went to an event for bloggers at the Blogger & Vlogger Network. I barely said a word. One of my favorite bloggers was there, I had told myself that if I saw her that I would send her an IM to say hi and let her know that her work really inspires me. Well I sat with an IM open to her for 25 mins and couldn’t for the life of me find the words to type her. When I did I rewrote a single sentence a dozen times and then didn’t even send it and TPed out there.

I felt so defeated. This was not the person I once was in SL. I was always bold and social in SL… because behind the pixel mask I wasn’t as afraid to be myself. I started thinking what changed? What fundamentally changed about how I interact with people in SL that I now am so afraid to even say hello?

I guess when I was such a social person and out there type of person in SL because I had a social circle that I was almost always with. I knew people, my friends knew people… I didn’t feel like an odd man out. While I am still super close with my SL peeps… it’s not in SL any more. We interact far more outside of SL than we ever did in world.

I am trying to go down a new path in SL… I am trying my hand at perhaps starting a family. It would work well with my hopes of one day soon having my own photography buisness but so far I really haven’t had too much luck. Adoption is a scary process. I have had a few interactions and that self doubt has really cropped up again. Am I too wired? I am comming off too friendly, too open… so many questions and no real answers.

Right now I am really doubting myself a lot. I made up my mind to put out and decorate a new house. Just something to do to hopefully lift my spirits. I picked up this really pretty house at the Apple Fall sale, now I am not sure if long term it is going to be the house for me but if not it would serve really well as a building for my studio. I am enjoying myself… it’s a good distraction from my inner demons at the moment.

I guess I should try to get out more in SL…. I gotta meet people again. I gotta try and break out of my little prison that my house and land has become.

I heard that Cassie Middles is doing a dating game show for her youtube.. I saw a “Friendship take over” version of it the other day… perhaps I will sign up to try and be on it. My luck though I would get picked… go and fucking crash… (see how my brain works >.<)

ah… well I will blog some of the other stuff that I picked up at the Apple Fall sale when I get a chance this week.

 

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Current Events · My Second Life

{crawling in my skin}

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I am of that age group that is probably a little more emotionally effected by the news of Linkin Park singer Chester Bennington’s apparent suicide. When I heard the news last night I was making dinner and checked my FB and it was a filled with my friends sharing the same TMZ story. I didn’t want to believe it was true, TMZ is gossip and tabloid site… they are far from credible. Then the other stories, from far more credible sources came out and I actually got so emotional I walked in the other room and cried.

I am never one to beat around the bush about my own mental health struggles. I have battled my own demons for most of my life and nearly took my own life on more than one occasion. Linkin Park’s music was reminder to me in my darkest days that I wasn’t alone in the way I felt, that I could keep going. That I needed to keep fighting. I know that was never the intention of their music, but I also know that I am far from the only person to site Linkin Park’s music as something that has gotten us through some dark times. To think that the front man, the face of the band, took his own life… alone… knowing the desperation that one feels to reach that point breaks my heart in a way I really can’t put into words.

I am not religious, but I hope that Chester has found peace. I hope that his children will be able to not just see how their father’s life ended but the mark he made on the world through his music. I know it is of little solace to the family but his music will live on. His fans will never forget him.

Please if you are struggling, reach out to someone…anyone… and ask for help. The world can’t afford to keep losing their brightest stars… ❤

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Phone Number
  • 1-800-273-8255

 

My Second Life

{trying to make a buck}

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I think one of the things that is hard for me is keeping on task. I have a million little ideas that I want to do in SL but I gotta pick one or two and stick to them. So after some deep thoughts I have decided to open my own photo studio to take a few appointments a week for photos priced at a reasonable amount (I am still working on pricing). Now, just like in real life I gotta come up with the capital to start this business.

So like so many people before me I am selling my Gacha extras to help fund this business. Now I am putting my RL money into as well, but poses, backdrops, props and all that are not cheap and while I am building client base (hopefully) I gotta come up with another form of income to help me get this business off the ground.

I am still gonna keep my Lost Girl Desgins shape business going as well, but that will always just be a MP based business. I see no reason for me to make that an in world store at this time as I really make these shapes more for myself to play with and toss them up on the MP for only 99L$ so if someone likes them or needs a shape for their new bento head… there ya go with out breaking the bank because good god damn bento heads are expensive!

I am one of those people that knows that I will always end up putting money into SL but it can’t hurt to try and start some kind of business as well because ya know what guys… blogging is expensive as all get up! I am no where big enough to seek out blogger positions yet so all the stuff I blog I pay for, so please help me keep this blog going by supporting my businesses!

Gacha Sign 01

Main Shop: http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/Nuernberg%20West/216/32/28

My Table @ Epic Gacha : http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/Beraudes/46/224/3334

All Commons  10L$ – 35L$, Items from all the “big” gacha events. New & Old. Doe, Glam Affair, Spell, Astraila, Alme, Commet, Moon Amore, Disorderly, Birch, and more! Hair, skins, clothes… really I have little bit of everything!

Please come buy my junk and help me get Winter Rose Studio off the ground!!!!

Miss.Chelsea · Second Life Fashion · Shopping Adventures

{sweet summer child} – part two

…and on to part two of my Miss. Chelsea haul. I gotta say, I don’t do massive shops very often, mostly because I am pretty picky when it comes to my personal style but Miss. Chelsea has some of the best casual clothes (at least for my tastes) that I have found. They are totally on par with Blueberry for me when it comes to staple pieces. I did get a top that is more of a “special” piece. This top was something that I was like “oh I want something like this to really wear”. I loved the baggy fall sweater, I know I said I was looking for summer clothes but this totally works for a cool summer evening and I am sticking to that story. It came in a variety of mutted colors but like usual I went with a black/grey tone. I paired it with their “jeggings” and despite some clipping it worked pretty well.

Now I can’t remember or not, but this dress may actually be one of the group gifts. It’s one of the rare Miss. Chelsea items that comes with a color/texture changing hud, which is a feature I love personally. I liked this little dress, it works very well for a going out to the club situation.

Now the shorts are a different color of a past FLF item that I loved and I obviously needed them in more than just the Pink they had for FLF about a month or so ago. They are fun and pretty awesome as far as shorts go with that nifty plaid shirt tied around the waist.

I also got to point out that the hair I am wearing in this photo was from this friday’s (7/7/17) FLF from Wasabi Pills, which is long time favorite hair store of mine and the pretty awesome cup featured in this photo as well is an item from DRBC from the latest round of The Chapter Four (you get it when you buy their lipstick “coffee stains” which I wore in the previous photo set).

I know my photo’s aren’t super complex (yet) but I am working on acquiring more and more items. It’s a process over time to build a solid prop library and while thanks in part to Gacha events I am getting a lot more stuff to work with it is still going to take time for me to really get all the items I need. I have a very small plot of land and I am currently trying to set up three different areas for photos. So that being said I hope to be bringing you some more interesting (is that even the right word?) photos here before too long. It’s very expensive to buy high quality landscaping items and I had absolutely none in my inventory prior to May, so as time goes on… things (I hope) will get better and better.

The blog is still in it’s baby years 😛

Full outfit lists below:

Outfit #1

Hair – Doe – June Arcade ’17

Top – Miss Chelsea –

Leggings – Miss. Chelsea

Skin – Glam Affair – gacha item

Tattoos – Dappa – Imagine

Lipstick – Warpaint* – Berry

Outfit #2

Hair – Exile – No One

Dress – Miss. Chelsea

Skin – Glam Affair – gacha item

Tattoos – Dappa – Imagine

Eyeshadow – Suicidal Unborn –

Lipstick – DRBC – Coffee Stains – The Chapter Four (July 2017)

Necklace – Spell – Dragon Choker Silver (gacha item)

Outfit#3

Skin – Glam Affair – gacha item

Tattoos – Dappa – Imagine

Eyeshadow – Zombie Suicide –

Lipstick – Warpaint* – Berry

Top – BOOM (flf item)

Hair – Wasabi Pills – flf item

Tumbler – DRBC – “Resting Witch Face” Cup

Shorts – miss Chelsea – effie shorts

 

Miss.Chelsea · Second Life Fashion · Shopping Adventures

{sweet summer child} – part one

One of my favorite things about holidays is sales… both in RL and SL. One of those sales I stumbled across a great on at Miss Chelsea which is one of my favorite Fifty Linden Friday stops. To have access to the sale you do have to be part of the group but it is 100L$ spent! There are a couple great group gifts too.

I had been spying this dress but I hate spending so much on a dress that I probably won’t wear for much more of pictures or the rare occasion I go out of a club. It’s very cute and to me feels like something I would slouch around the house in, so perhaps I will wear this a little more often.

The second thing I snagged was this outfit which is a cute little t-shirt, I got the ones with desgins, and a pair of shorts. One thing I can say is that I don’t have much in way of summer clothes so this sale has provided me with some much needed summer running around clothes and I just was so stinking happy when I figured out that even their packs which are normally 500L$ were also half so I took full advantage and so pleased!

AH this leggings/top combo… probably my very very favorite outfit of the moment. With this hair and the pair of heals I have on… it makes me feel like a punk rock Sandy from Grease (…see it????… *giggles*). I will get SO MUCH use out of these legging and plaid shirt combo, this is a look I do very often in RL so I squeed with joy when I saw these and got them in all the colors.. which was a rare splurge for me.

The whole feel of these photos is embracing summer, and for me summer is about enjoying beautiful weather… even if you wear all black. HAHA.

 

Outfit Lists

Outfit #1

Dress – Miss Chelsea – Lili Tee Dress – Grey

Tattoos – Dappa – Imagination

Skin – Glam Affair – from the Loot Box Gacha event

Necklace – Minimal – “Animal Companions – Moose Gold”

Hair – Clawtooth

Make Up – Suicidal Unborn & Warpaint*

Outfit #2

Outfit – Miss. Chelsea – Leia Outfit – Galaxy

Tattoos – Dappa – Imagination

Skin – Glam Affair – from the Loot Box Gacha event

Hair – Magika – The Wish [04]

Necklace – Zombie Suicide – Fable

Outfit #3

Leggings – Alva Leggings – Purple

Top – Liza Top – Black

Tattoos – Dappa – Imagination

Skin – Glam Affair – from the Loot Box Gacha event

Necklace- Pixel Box – Dark Cross and Magic

 

All the backgrounds are from Second Snaps!

Stay Tuned for part 2!!

..::LGD::.. · Second Life Fashion

New Shapes!

The best laid plans of mice and men…

I had planned to try and get a few new posts out and get my new shape up… but life got in the way. Sometimes I will be the first to admit I try way to hard to make plans that I know may not happen. It’s huge fault of mine, but when you has a medically complex kiddo in RL, life gets crazy. (more on this in a later post)

But I said I was going to launch a new shape and I am gonna do one better I got not one but two new shapes up on the marketplace!

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Meet Candy! A shape I have been working on for quite some time. She is probably the closest I will get to my own personal shape. The idea behind Candy was to try and make something that could go sweet, yet sexy at the same time. Which was way harder for me to achieve that you would think! It is available for 99L$ on the marketplace!

Marketplace: https://marketplace.secondlife.com/p/LGD-Candy-Catya-Bento-Shape/12146324

 

Our second offering is the first of several shapes I am going to be launching over the next two months. Loosely based of minor characters from A Song of Ice and Fire or the books that Game of Thrones is based off of. Most of these characters are dead by the time the books/show starts. I decided to do this because I felt that it would be more fun for me to basically make these small characters come to life. When I originally read the ASoIaF books I actually started do sketches of some of the characters how they appeared in my mind which is what I lot of these shapes are based off of.

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For fans of the books you may wonder which Elia is this shape based off of, well that would be Elia Martell, sister of the Red Viper and wife of Rhaegar Targaryen. Her beauty was legendary in the Seven Kingdoms and I have always be intrigued with the culture of Dorne. This is my first attempt at a more ethnic shape, with influences from several Asian and Middle Eastern features. That is the beauty of the Dornish race is it’s a very diverse and exotic race in the mostly white bread Westeros.

This is one of my favorite shapes I have made so far. She is beautiful and I had so much fun shooting this shape because it looked just about perfect in just about any light.

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She is really a stunning shape that even if you aren’t a GoT fan that you could appreciate and use! I am extremely proud of this shape and like all my shapes she will be available on the marketplace for 99 L$.

Marketplace: https://marketplace.secondlife.com/p/LGD-Elia-Shape-for-Catwa-Catya/12146342

 

 

Collabor88 · Hair Hair EVERYWHERE! · Second Life Fashion · Shopping Adventures · Tableau Vivant · Uncategorized

So I got distracted by hair…again

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With out a single doubt in my mind, besides poses, the next largest file in my inventory is marked “!!HAIR” because I love to change my hair… A LOT. I am also super picky about my hair, then again I am super picky about everything I wear in SL for that matter. HAHA. Ok in all seriousness though, when I am putting together an outfit I have always felt that hair plays a crucial role.

I am not one of those people who only wear one brand of hair. Back in the day I was, it was usually all Truth hair. Since coming back though, I have decided to be really open to different designers and I have come to discover I like A LOT of different designers.

My newest discovery is Tableau Vivant, which I am sure a lot of people already were aware of but they are pretty new to me. See I am an avid shopper of the event Collabor88, it has been around for ages and always has amazing finds. When I popped round to check out this month’s event I feel in love with Tableau Vivant’s offering this month.

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It’s a unisex undercut hair style. They also have a hair base (Omega and Catwa appliers) that goes along with that I highly recommend getting as well. This is a hair style that I would have probably had in my late teen years when I was still fairly heavy into goth scene. It’s a lot of fun for some slightly androgynous pictures of some throw back to my punk rock days.

It’s a fun hair and It wasn’t too expensive, which is always a perk.

If you want to learn more about the Collabor88 event please go hop over to their blog! : http://collabor88.com/

If you are courious to see what else Tableau Vivant has to offer SL in the way of beautiful hair style, hop on over to their marketplace store!  https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/147454